A Few Words On The Holidays

Just to let you know, I’m not the most holiday oriented person. My decorating is limited to one battery operated desk-friendly snowman with shifting colored lights in his belly, and two mini stockings (purple) nailed to the bedroom door.


I give the snowman a couple fresh batteries, and the stockings stay nailed to the door all year long. A holiday scented wax tart gets popped in the wax warmer and that my friends, is the extent of my festive expression for the season.

My mother always finds my seasonal expressions to be insufficient. I don’t think a year goes by anymore without her calling me “Scrooge” at least once regarding my lack of decoration (we celebrate Christmas in her well-decorated home every year, if I’m not celebrating gift exchange at my place, what is the point?), and my expressions of distaste regarding what passes for Christmas music these days.

I’m sorry but songs about children starving, grandma’s dying, and wives fighting a losing battle with cancer are not “touching”, “sentimental”, or “inspiring” to me. These songs are depressing as hell. I’m not sure when it came into vogue for Christmas songs to be tragic odysseys of melancholy despair…but it’s not a trend I enjoy one bit. I’ll listen to White Christmas or Jingle Bell Rock, but I don’t want to listen to heart gouging glurge. Tears in my eyes and a giant lump in my throat are not Christmas-y to me.

“But WhiteRaven, aren’t you an atheist? What are you doing celebrating a religious holiday at all? Isn’t that an admission that you actually believe?”

Christmas is just one of the current names for this celebration. The celebration itself is older than that name, or its older names like Yule or Saturnalia. The celebration is more important than the name attached to it, and I can say Christmas just fine without bursting into flames, though I usually stick to “Happy Holidays” as a greeting as it covers everyone regardless of their religious proclivities. I occasionally have had people angrily say “Merry CHRISTmas!” in response to my preferred salutation. I find this ironic and hypocritical as supposedly this is the season for peace on earth and goodwill to all mankind, yet some Christians are steadfast Holiday Hogs and don’t want to share the Season with the rest of us. And yes, I single out the Christians on this one, as I’ve never had anyone rudely snap back with “Happy HANNUKKAH!” or “Happy KWANZAA!” when I greet them with Happy Holidays. There may be some touchy celebration hoggers in those camps too I’ve just not encountered them.

I mentioned before that the celebration is more important than the name attached to it. What do I mean by that?

I’m referring to the psychological value of social connection. I will admit I’m a hermit. It’s not that I don’t value the people in my life I just don’t have that need to connect on a regular basis with people beyond my intimate circle. My mother (and I’m sure other folks) sees this as a flaw, and express that I need to “try harder” without really understanding what this means for introverted little me. I let the people closest to me know I care with specifically chosen gifts, and online shopping is my best friend in the world. Less actual shopping means less stress for me, and more people I’m willing to get gifts for, and my social circle can expand a touch as a result.

Funny, but the Santa Claus concept represents a figure that makes me look extroverted by comparison.

Think about it. The guy spends 364 days with just his wife, some reindeer, and elves (non-humans). Then on one night a year, sneaks into every home in the world to leave carefully chosen presents for people while they are ASLEEP. If that doesn’t say “I want you to know I care about you, I just don’t want to have to deal with you.” I don’t know what does.

Like Santa, it won’t kill even the most reclusive amongst us to take the time to think on our loved ones and see to it we show our appreciation by giving them a gift that shows we really DO pay attention to them, and appreciate their interests even if we don’t tell them so all the time.